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                                         Phyllis Thacker                                      Greg Leib   

                               

     The intensely sunny afternoon grew hotter by the minute. Kelly, the RideShare driver was exhausted from driving all day. The day felt like it was getting longer. The pings from his handsfree phone app signaling new ride requests were slowing accordingly. He desperately needed this virtually instant money. Especially since the pandemic had taken hold of the country and the world, decimating his Rideshare income, which was marginal even in normal times.

     Kelly pulled into a strip-mall parking lot to nod off for a few winks to revive himself; afterward, he would accept a few more riders before turning in for the day. For safety precautions, drivers are only allowed to drive so many consecutive hours. Kelly thought he turned the app off. He let the engine run to keep the interior cool and closed his eyes. Just then, the roar of engines startled him from his dreamlike state. He reeled at the sight of a huge surreal-looking drone hovering just in front of his windshield. “What the fuck!?” he shouted in fear.

     Kelly heard a loud whooshing sound, and at the same time his phone pinged distinctly with a two-rider request for the same location. Despite his panic, Kelly instinctively verified ride acceptance by tapping the app. Abruptly, magically, both rear doors opened. One of the two women asked him, “RideShare for Cheri and Rexa?” before they climbed in and sat down behind him. Kelly turned and beheld two stunningly beautiful women smiling amiably at him. Speechless, he nodded in the affirmative. He continued to stare at them; dressed to kill, he thought, at once, regretting the words as unlucky in the context of his current vocation. Kelly’s unique passengers were very shapely, wore fashion-forward jewelry, form-fitting low cut mini dresses, and perfume so enticing that what man would not be mesmerized by the experience?

     Kelly returned to his driving tasks. He noticed the big drone had disappeared without a sound. Had he been hallucinating?

     Kelly was pleased that the women’s destination was an extended distance across town. Long rides would help build back part of his lost income, and it might add an interlude of pleasant conversation.

      In keeping with customer service etiquette, he struck up conversation, easy to do as both women proved amenable to chatting. Cheri had long blonde hair, blue eyes, and red lacquer lipstick, which danced against her fair skin, drawing attention to the sound of her silky voice. Rexa had long chestnut brown hair, green eyes, and shiny glossed lips, which sparkled invitingly through the hypnotic sound of the exotic beauty’s sultry voice. Such pleasant voices, such stimulating conversation. But wasn’t there something otherworldly about this pair?

     Kelly wanted to keep his five-star RideShare rating. He offered Rexa and Cheri water, use of phone chargers, and individually wrapped candies. Normally, these small amenities enhance the rider experience, and hopefully, the driver’s ratings.

     “Do you have any strawberry shortcake?” asked Cheri. “We heard our destination has the best selection in town.”

     “Not exactly,” Kelly replied. “But I do have some strawberry filled candies.”

     Kelly relied on GPS technology for routing information. He also relied on the voice-guided feature, one employing a feminine voice he had affectionately dubbed Jacquelyn. Most riders who cared enough to voice an opinion were polarized about the sound of Jacquelyn’s voice. While there are those riders who found her voice sultry, the majority found her voice aggravating. As Jaquelyn began to speak, both Cheri and Rexa groaned loudly. Rexa said, “Oh not her again! Could you puleeeze pick another voice? We simply despise, hate, and cannot tolerate that GPS bitch you call Jacquelyn. Please, Kelly, ditch that awful bitchy voice now! Always interested in the best rider experience, Kelly replied, “Sure, ladies. Sorry.” Experienced with the software, he readily switched to a male voice with a clear, clipped Australian accent.

      In their rider requests, Cheri and Rexa earlier scheduled an extra stop to pick up convenience store items. As Kelly waited in his car in the convenience store parking spot, he heard the thunderous roar of another drone approaching. It swooped in close, huge and terrifying as before. Rexa and Cheri got out of the car, shutting the doors simultaneously. Kelly heard another distinctive whoosh, accompanied by another pinging ride request. Once again, Kelly wondering what is up with the drones, tapped the icon, accepting the request.

      A man opened the passenger door, introduced himself as “Jack,” and sat down. He was handsome, evenly tanned, clearly a fit specimen. He flashed a winning smile, blue eyes, dark hair, a sexy voice, much like that of the Australian GPS voice that had been guiding them to this point. And he wore a cologne that women find attractive, perhaps irresistible. Jack confirmed with Kelly his RideShare and his destination, oddly, the same as Rexa and Cheri’s, all the way across town.

      Again, the drone had somehow disappeared, apparently while the driver was too distracted with his new passenger to notice.

      Kelly scratched his head but welcomed Jack and explained that they would all be on their way as soon as the ladies returned from the store. Jack politely declined Rideshare items that Kelly offered. Upon their return to the vehicle, Cheri and Rexa clearly were incredibly pleased to be introduced to Jack, their surprise travel-mate. The quest for strawberry shortcake resumed.

     The long day turned to dusk. As Kelly’s passengers chatted merrily among themselves, Kelly had time to ponder the bizarre aspects of his current fares – the thundering drone and the simultaneous appearances of mysterious companions in adventure. Kelly was visited by random, fleeting thoughts of various alien conspiracy theories, too much sun, not enough sleep, or even artificial intelligences -- if true, freakier than words can express! Perhaps he should consider seeing a shrink, a priest, a futurist, to explain the drone, how his riders had arrived. Perhaps it was time to seek career counseling to find more secure and lucrative work.

      Kelly considered his good fortune in driving three paying fares at the same time across town. Oh well, he thought, as the poet Robert Frost would say.... ‘And miles to go before I sleep, and miles to go before I sleep. With Jack, Rexa, Cheri, and Kelly secured in their seatbelts, the quest for strawberry shortcake continued.

     Jack, Rexa, Cheri, and Kelly, in easy conversation, examined varied matters, great and small, in general and in detail. Kelly quietly noted that Cheri and Rexa had each taken a fancy to Jack, who seemed to show greater interest in professional conversation with Kelly than with the stunning beauties vying for his favor. In fact, he became distinctly uncomfortable with the ladies’ increasing ardor and competitive behavior. Each of the beauties seemed sure that it would be she alone who would accompany Jack at some point after the RideShare experience.

     Soon the competition descended into arguments in which both Cheri and Rexa expressed their displeasure with each other in very coarse and unladylike language. At this turn, a new and disturbing scenario began to unfold. Fortunately, Kelly knew the city, because his direction finder went wacko, the radio turned into mere static, the electronic windows wouldn’t work, and the door locks began to switch on and off.

     Distressing as this was to Kelly, it was only a symptom of a wider calamity affecting all electronic equipment within a five-mile radius of the chaos that permeated his car. Electronics along the car’s swath were failing, airwaves going crazy and not working properly. Similarly, the devices in houses as they traveled across the city stopped responding to their owners’ commands. The home devices simply went dark and silent -- no setting of alarms, no tuning into favorite radio stations and saved playlists. Nothing worked!

     Jack rightly perceived that the turmoil behind him related to himself. He told Kelly in clear audible tones that he and his partner had been in a solid relationship for a couple of years and that they were faithful and did not date other people. Jack mentioned his ride would terminate at the next stop, and that he would not be rejoining the ladies afterward.

     Somehow it all resonated with Cheri and Rexa. At once, they ceased their loud and bitter feud. Miraculously, simultaneously, electronics in the Rideshare car and those along the broad swath of their journey resumed their tasks as if nothing had happened. Arriving at their destination, the two women were friends again, and they went inside the building together to order their Strawberry Shortcake -- the one whose ad had claimed the most flavors.

     Once inside, they realized that their quest had ended in a marijuana shop dispensing flavored edibles. They bought the Strawberry Shortcake flavor and returned to the car. They did not open their package until the vehicle was well under way, then opened the package and confirmed that Strawberry Shortcake was a flavor for vape pens. Neither woman vaped nor smoked, but once a product leaves the dispensary, it cannot be returned. “All that time and money wasted!” they exclaimed in unison. Cheri and Rexa discussed their dilemma and decided to leave the vape pens with the driver for an extra gratuity in this state that had only recently legalized recreational-use marijuana. Rexa and Cheri asked the driver to drop them off at a nearby upscale restaurant for a more traditional Strawberry Shortcake.